Life Is A Game (?)
“Game? Or no game?”
- (Some French movie) that I watched a while ago and can't decide whether to recommend or not.
“So far, so good”
- attributed to a guy falling from a 25-floor building...as he passed floor 20.
One of my friends remarked that I always start my blog entries with “Life is interesting” so I'll dispense with such trivialities this time. Life is a game now. I know the rules and I know how the game is played. It's up to me to play it well, such that I win in the end. It bears stating explicitly that life is not a zero-sum game – just because I want to win doesn't mean I want others to lose. We can all win at the game of life, and ideally it would be that way. Anyhow, the game awaits...I shall explain.
I've been walking a deep dark valley in my life for several weeks. The road of life was level and beautiful, but then it plunged headlong into a place rife with heartbreak and struggle. The road seemed to dead end into a wall, a wall into which I've been pounding my head. First, I asked God “why”, but that subsided after a while, only to be replaced with “what now?” God has been pretty quiet, even when the quiet “now what?” gives way to the “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??”.
Finally, though, there seem to be shallow handholds in the wall ahead of me. There is a way out of the valley, or at least something that looks like it. To mix metaphors, the river is still rushing, but is overflowing its banks less and I can finally see where the fording stones are. Both the handholds and the fording stones are far apart...really far apart, but I can see them. Oddly, though, there seems to be two sets. They both lead “out”, but in very different directions. Neither seem to be easier or more promising, there's just two paths.
The path ahead will be hard, but I can do hard. I have Jesus on my side, and even if I fall, He's always been there to catch me. I can follow His footsteps, but I've been waiting to see where they go. Hard “ain't nothing but a thing” when Jesus is with me. Impossible, impassible, implausible – these things are difficult. “Hard” is doable.
Two paths, though. Let's call them Path 1 and Path 2.
Path 1 is very likely to not show positive results for a long time. The path starts out vertical, with even a slight overhang. It would be really hard and push me to the limits of myself. There's a small chance of a huge payoff in the end, which might be (OK, is probably) worth it. But my friends say that this path will destroy my life in the short run.
Path 2 starts out flat, maybe even a little downhill. I guess that it might eventually lead out of my valley, but it might also lead right over a cliff with little to no warning. This path offers a very quick return on investment, potentially showing good results immediately. Somehow it seems less likely to succeed in the long run, but that's not for sure either. Oh yeah, and I know that I might destroy my life down this road in the long run.
There is probably a path 3. There's always another way out. It would be like finding a pebble between two mountains, though.
I've seen this setup before in my life. It happens frequently in everyone's life. Jay calls it “God's way” and the “attractive alternative”. “Just before God brings His best,” Jay says, “Satan brings his best.” The idea is that it's a trap, something to lure you into falling just short of the great plan that God has for your life. This is notably a bifurcated structure in my life. Two big broad paths with little to distinguish between them.
For my Vineyard friends, Pastor Jim has a similar analogy. At Flatirons, there is “...always two deals on the table.” One is God's way leading to a better life, one is the way of the unredeemed flesh leading to the same old stuff your life has always. You can pick whichever you want without judgment. One leads to life, one to death, but it's always your choice.
Part of the problem this time is that I don't know which is which. I'm pretty sure that one is good and one is great, but I can't tell which is which. On this point, God is still silent. I'm reduced to the way I've been “following God” for the past month – take itty-bitty baby steps the way I think I'm supposed to go and wait to find the wall with my nose (or my toes, however that goes.)
That's all the words I have – here are some words from other people that I've been enjoying this week and last.
“Though He slay me, I will hope in Him. Nevertheless, I will argue my ways [to His face].” - Job 13:15
“And it will be said in that day, 'Behold, this is our God for whom we have waited that He might save us. This is the Lord for whom we have waited; let us rejoice and be glad in His salvation.” - Isaiah 25:9 (v.6-9 is better, but long)
Hillsong - Love You So Much
Hillsong - Healer
Hillsong - Stronger
(No, I don't have a Hillsong thing going on at all)
- (Some French movie) that I watched a while ago and can't decide whether to recommend or not.
“So far, so good”
- attributed to a guy falling from a 25-floor building...as he passed floor 20.
One of my friends remarked that I always start my blog entries with “Life is interesting” so I'll dispense with such trivialities this time. Life is a game now. I know the rules and I know how the game is played. It's up to me to play it well, such that I win in the end. It bears stating explicitly that life is not a zero-sum game – just because I want to win doesn't mean I want others to lose. We can all win at the game of life, and ideally it would be that way. Anyhow, the game awaits...I shall explain.
I've been walking a deep dark valley in my life for several weeks. The road of life was level and beautiful, but then it plunged headlong into a place rife with heartbreak and struggle. The road seemed to dead end into a wall, a wall into which I've been pounding my head. First, I asked God “why”, but that subsided after a while, only to be replaced with “what now?” God has been pretty quiet, even when the quiet “now what?” gives way to the “WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME??”.
Finally, though, there seem to be shallow handholds in the wall ahead of me. There is a way out of the valley, or at least something that looks like it. To mix metaphors, the river is still rushing, but is overflowing its banks less and I can finally see where the fording stones are. Both the handholds and the fording stones are far apart...really far apart, but I can see them. Oddly, though, there seems to be two sets. They both lead “out”, but in very different directions. Neither seem to be easier or more promising, there's just two paths.
The path ahead will be hard, but I can do hard. I have Jesus on my side, and even if I fall, He's always been there to catch me. I can follow His footsteps, but I've been waiting to see where they go. Hard “ain't nothing but a thing” when Jesus is with me. Impossible, impassible, implausible – these things are difficult. “Hard” is doable.
Two paths, though. Let's call them Path 1 and Path 2.
Path 1 is very likely to not show positive results for a long time. The path starts out vertical, with even a slight overhang. It would be really hard and push me to the limits of myself. There's a small chance of a huge payoff in the end, which might be (OK, is probably) worth it. But my friends say that this path will destroy my life in the short run.
Path 2 starts out flat, maybe even a little downhill. I guess that it might eventually lead out of my valley, but it might also lead right over a cliff with little to no warning. This path offers a very quick return on investment, potentially showing good results immediately. Somehow it seems less likely to succeed in the long run, but that's not for sure either. Oh yeah, and I know that I might destroy my life down this road in the long run.
There is probably a path 3. There's always another way out. It would be like finding a pebble between two mountains, though.
I've seen this setup before in my life. It happens frequently in everyone's life. Jay calls it “God's way” and the “attractive alternative”. “Just before God brings His best,” Jay says, “Satan brings his best.” The idea is that it's a trap, something to lure you into falling just short of the great plan that God has for your life. This is notably a bifurcated structure in my life. Two big broad paths with little to distinguish between them.
For my Vineyard friends, Pastor Jim has a similar analogy. At Flatirons, there is “...always two deals on the table.” One is God's way leading to a better life, one is the way of the unredeemed flesh leading to the same old stuff your life has always. You can pick whichever you want without judgment. One leads to life, one to death, but it's always your choice.
Part of the problem this time is that I don't know which is which. I'm pretty sure that one is good and one is great, but I can't tell which is which. On this point, God is still silent. I'm reduced to the way I've been “following God” for the past month – take itty-bitty baby steps the way I think I'm supposed to go and wait to find the wall with my nose (or my toes, however that goes.)
That's all the words I have – here are some words from other people that I've been enjoying this week and last.
“Though He slay me, I will hope in Him. Nevertheless, I will argue my ways [to His face].” - Job 13:15
“And it will be said in that day, 'Behold, this is our God for whom we have waited that He might save us. This is the Lord for whom we have waited; let us rejoice and be glad in His salvation.” - Isaiah 25:9 (v.6-9 is better, but long)
Hillsong - Love You So Much
Hillsong - Healer
Hillsong - Stronger
(No, I don't have a Hillsong thing going on at all)
posted by The student of life at 10:12 PM
4 Comments:
"Yes, there are two paths you can go by, but in the long run.
There's still time to change the road you're on" - Led Zepplin, Stairway to Heaven.
I have no idea if it's relevant of not, but I always thought it was a cool line.
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost
What if, what if both paths or either path could bring you to the same place? And it didn't matter quite so much which path you took, but where you were really seeking to go?
Matt - Yay for both Zepplin and proper literary references. Thanks for sharing. I'm figuring out how much of following God is "the road less traveled" and how much might be "learn from others' mistakes"
Marie - Your second thought is especially important. It doesn't matter quite as much just where I'm headed as long as my intention is to follow God. This is my abiding hope and what I try to evaluate my actions by.
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